The United Wrestling Federation is about as pro wrestling as pro wrestling has ever been. Founded in 1990 as an intended challenger for the WWF, Herb Abrams’ promotion would air on SportsChannel America. With a frankly unhinged talent pool and Bruno Sammartino on commentary, they taped at Reseda Country Club, then heading to New York for a date in early 1991. Florida was next, playing host to their first PPV event.
Beach Brawl would live in infamy, drawing horrifically and effectively killing the promotion. Bam Bam Bigelow and ‘Dr. Death’ Steve Williams had the honour of closing that show, meeting for the vacant UWF SportsChannel Television Title. The presentation includes two hilarious pre-match interviews, with Bigelow struggling his way to a claim that he’d be following a gameplan. Williams was like Dusty Rhodes by contrast, at least avoiding the temptation to simply laugh his way through the ordeal.
More art occurs before the bell also, even playing a pivotal role. Abrams himself is introduced in order to present the new title, shaking hands with Williams and then offering the same to Bigelow. The big man rejects however, snatching Abrams only for Williams to charge him in the meantime. “That was nasty,” Sammartino critiques. In the meantime, Bigelow turns it around, landing a big headbutt before splashing Williams in the corner.
Within seconds, Williams’ face is covered in blood, firing back via clothesline that launches Bigelow onto his face. An onslaught of knees follow, rocking Bigelow who’s now bleeding himself. Williams is directly targeting the wound, with Bigelow stumbling from one blow to the next. Headbutts arrive in response, with Williams seeking a quick pin as they brawl back and forth. Just as Williams appears to have Bigelow on the ropes, he’s caught in a big time Samoan drop, kicking out at 2.
The slingshot splash follows, with Williams surviving again. Man, this rocks but unfortunately, they’re basically wrestling in an empty arena. Either way, Bigelow continues to dominate, coming off the top with a big splash but still not closing the show. Instead, Williams rallies with a belly to belly suplex, following up via clothesline. Two Oklahoma stampedes come next, setting the stage for a powerslam that Bigelow barely kicks out of.
Bigelow hangs on to the top rope as Williams seeks another, making him earn the conclusive powerslam to become champion. This is quietly awesome, hilariously. I really do mean quietly too, as the undercard appears to have further depleted their already slim house. Even still, this manages some life, almost exciting Bruno along the way. It’s a surprisingly spirited effort from two heavyweights that were making their money elsewhere.
They inexplicably bring it here anyway, working an engaging sprint. I wish Bigelow wrestled more matches of this ilk, exchanging bombs for seven minutes or so and calling it a day. His reputation meant that for my money, his big time matches were often stretched beyond their limit. That wasn’t the case here at Beach Brawl though, producing a highlight that’s almost entirely lost to the darkness and hilarity surrounding it in history.
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